ABC survey

been working everyday since i got back from vegas! gahh i'm exhausted..off the next two days, woohoo. time to catch up on laundry..been piling up for weeks now, and i need to clean up my room! i've been meaning to organize and throw away shit i dont need, so i can make room for cyndy's mini fridge haha, i still need to clean it, and her microwave to lol =) dont worry, i know you want that back, but for the summer i want live in my room haha. i was on xanga again being bored reading old posts..heres another retro survery , updated answers in parenthesis..

[[..abC survey..]]

[a]ge: 17 on da 22nd of dis month =D (21 years young)
[b]estfriends: so many..but kaye is the one im really close to.. (nichelle, my evil bestfriend ginalyn, cyndy, my bestfriend from another state aka my best ever princess, and the rest of my top friends)
[c]hoice of meat: chicken?..but thatz poultry huh?..oh well.. (beef)
[d]ream date: to have fun! of course..though i never been on one..so wat do i knoe? (as long as its special between us)
[e]xciting adventure: to get out of this house for the summer is adventure itself! (all my adventures are exciting haha)
[f]avorite food: chicken (same)
[g]reatest accomplishment: 4.12 GPA (damn forreals!? 4.12!! haha, i miss that)
[h]appiest day of your life: do u see me wid a gf!?!? (several)
[i]nterests: basketball..KINGS!..going online..watching TV..etc.. (pretty much the same)
[j]ello: "theres always room for jello beotch!!!" (cool whip)
[k]ool aid: i m not much of a kool-aid person (same)
[l]ove: my frends and family of course =D (same)
[m]ost valued: my own life..and the lifes of the ones i love.. (same again)
[n]ame: ralph warren ordona madriaga =D
[o]utfit you wore to school today: didn't go skewl today..duh! (didnt go to school today)
[p]izza topping: pepperoni..and hawaiian (combination without the mushrooms though)
[q]uestion most asked: wtf? lol (idk)
[r]adio station: 99.3 (star 99 kjoy) 94.1 (KHOP) (same , add 93.1)
[s]port: basketball
[t]elevision show: FRIENDS
[u]r favorite song: all my life by kci and jojo
[w]here you live: 209 stockton!
[x]yz: wtf?
[y]ear born: 1987
[z]odiac sign: i have cancer =( haha..jk

catch up time

i'm a try my best to blog about my vegas trip so here i go..

monday-went to stockton airport, started my vlog on the plane, met a nice couple on the plane, then when we landed first thing i did was hit the slot machines at the airport haha. picked up our luggage, then headed to the shuttle to take us to the car rental place. picked up the van, then got lost a little bit on the way to the hotel, rested for a bit, then headed for dinner. ate ate this chinese restaurant, then after hit first half of the strip! got my drink on with nichelle, buzzin on the way back to the hotel, bought more drinks for the hotel. that's night one.

tuesday-brunch at the buffet. hit the second half of the strip, hotel hopping, and shopping at the miracle mile shops. revisited different spots on the strip, went souvenir shopping, ate dinner, then headed out to more spots. didnt get to visit other spots like fremont street , cuz we were running out of time. around 12am, headed to henderson, nv. to pick up my friend who i met about 4-5 years ago online on MSO =) finally got to meet her in person! my best friend from another state! my best ever. picked her up, went to walmart, then went back to our hotel room and chilled for a bit till i took her home around 3. on the way home, she took me around suburbia, it was really cool, got to see the local side of lasvegas/henderson, got to see all these stores like smitihs, and vons, which we dont have here in cali, according to her its like our ralph's and longs drugs i guess. she took me on top of this hill where it has a beauitful view, of like the whole strip miles away, it was so pretty, i didnt have my camera though! fail! by the time i got back to my hotel after taking her home it was 5am, and the sun was out! haha headed straight for bed.

wednesday-flight was at 1245pm, so we had to hurry and get ready. returned the van , then ate at the airport at CPK! haha, played more slots for the last time before we boarded the plane. plane departure took forever this time! fell asleep waiting for it..woke up in the air, then landed in stockton around 2pm..picked up by my dad, took my friends home, then took a nap at home then headed to gina's house to upload pics and give her and aleena's pasalubong. and that was that. i vlogged everything, so i still need to edit them and post them up! i was just watching them all, and thers a lot of raw vegas footage! so sit tight. =)

back from vegas!

so many blogs to read, so many pics to upload so many videos to edit for vlog, so sit tight everyone..i'll be back and ready in no time! or maybe just a tad long time haha.

best ever! finally! haha =)

blogging real quick before church

havn't updated you guys in a while, so i'ma try. starting with friday, i was up at 430am to head to the bride's place and take pictures as she's getting ready and what not. i was hired as the camera man for gina's auntie's wedding. i had my video cam and digi cam just running around everywhere! so exhausting but i had fun. so yeah the ceremony was at 9, then the reception was at china palace at 1130 , o0o0weee was the reception fun. line dancing and getting my dance on with the old folks, and some young folks, lol. around 330 left to gina's house to rest cuz there was still an afterparty at the bride and grooms house! at ginas house, we were just uploading all the pics and videos, burning them on cds so we can bring it to the house. at the after party , we ate again, and chilled outside mostly, was teaching gina's kid how to ride a bike, wasn't going to well, but i tried haha. i had a beer earlier maybe that's why, haha. and then i had a craving to smoke, so i was for awhile, and i was twittering at the same time, then gina comes outside and is like wtf you doing!? so i stopped, haha. i love my evil bestfriend though, she takes care of me. left the party around 1130 headed home, cuz i had work at 7 the next morning.

so saturday, was my sister's birthday. after work, i went home, and we had a lil family thing, with a few friends, after we all ate, everyone went to diff parties, cuz there was like 3 last night! but i just went to one, my friends graduation party, drank over there, i was taking care of nichelle, cuz she could barely walk, and i had to take her to the bathroom so she can throw up. i was dancing in the garage, then saw her, i had to stop having fun to take care of my bestfriend. but then what irriated me more, was my sister gathering all this attention, cuz its her birthday and all and her friends wanted her to drink. i didnt want her to but whatever. ler her have fun, then she started crying and shit, at first everyone thought it was funny or whatever cuz she's buzzed and what not. but then she started doing and saying stupid shit, to the point where was kicking shit around in the backyard, cuz she wouldnt listen. i tried giving her water..but that didnt work, she wouldnt take it..so i told my cousin to carry her to the car, and we just bounced.

hmm, today nothing much happened yet, earlier i just dropped off gina some lunch and picked up my camera battery i left at her place. went back home to get ready for church, and here i am blogging right now and catching up on all my online communties. i'm off today, woohoo, going to vegas 2mrw!!! i cannot wait! gahhhhhhhhhhh!!! later days

finals over!

well more like final over, not finals, haha i had my final today at 8am, thanks again for my evil bestfriend ginalyn for waking me up today, i knew i was going to need it after we went drinking at BJ's last night. anyways, final went good, it was a group final, so we shared answers haha, but we did pull out a group effort. got a b+ on my paper which i bullshitted mostly, but i did do my research! i think that's what paid off, i had a good topic. after class, went straight home, took a nap, then went to run some errands, after all the errands, went back home, and now we're watching Taken again, good movie, but this is the 3rd time watching it now, everyone keeps wanting to watch it! tonight going to watch the baskeball game, lets go nuggets! and i think that's pretty much it. going to a wedding 2mrw! offical photographer=)

and heres another xanga survey and again my new anwers will be in parenthesis .. enjoy =)

-Name: Ralph Warren Ordona Madriaga
-Nicknames: Ralphie by most girls...
-Today’s Date: 2-13-04 (5/21/09)
-Birthdate: 7-22-87
-Birthplace: San Jose
-Current Age: 16 (21)
-Current Location: Stockton

[ON THE OUTSIDE]
-Height: i forgot...itz been since middleskewl fitness thingy where we check all dat sh!t (5'5")
-Weight: same as height...but im small...and not that tall...does that help?..haha (110)
-Hair Color: black
-Eye Color: Dark Brown
-Nationalities: Pinoy
-Shoe Size: 7 1/2 and 8 (8)
-What kind of clothes do you like: ne thing nice and casual (as long as it's comfy)
-What kind of jewelry do you wear: necklaces (just my earrings)
-Shirt Size: M or L (m)
-Favorite Colors to Wear: blue... although my favorit color is yellow (brown, gray, blue, white)
-Do you wear a belts: yea (yes)
-Has anybody ever said you look like a celebrity: nope (no)
-Do you look the same way you did five years ago: nope (no)

[ON THE INSIDE]

-Most Common Mood: depressed (hyper)
-Current Thoughts: valentines tomorro... (sigh) i dont have one (i'm full)
-Best Feeling: Happy and loved.. getting good grades of course.. winning too (being thought of)
-Worst Feeling: not loved and getting yelled at for no reason (being ignored)
-Do you like who you are: sometimes no...majortiy of the time i hate myself (yes i do)
-Do you like who you were then/who you are now: cant say at the moment (yes)
-Would you say that your life is difficult: all the time (at times)
-Do many people know of you: i guess (yeah i guess)
-Do many people KNOW you: hmm... just a few (uh huh)
-Are you shy / outgoing: both.. mostly shy (getting out of my shy side)
-Are you calm / hyper: hyper (hyper)
-Are you sad / happy: sad most of the time (happy most of the time now)
-Are you mad / sensible: are these opposites? hmm...sensible (sensible)
-Are you lazy / energetic: hmmx im both..lol (both)
-Are you stressed / relaxed: stressed (both)
-Are you nice / mean: im nice of course (nice =D)
-Are you understanding or not: understanding (understanding)
-Are you trustworthy or not: trustworthy of course (very)
-Are you a good / bad friend: good of course (great friend)
-Are you smart / dumb: smart.. dumb at times (smart buy lazy)
-Are you loving / hating: loving (lover not a fighter)
-Are you fun / boring: fun fo sho (fun)

[FAVORITES]
-Movie:theres hella movies...umm...mulan is one (all the retro disney movies)
-Singer: LINKIN PARK (your mom sings pretty good)
-Song: all my life by kci and jojo (same)
-Actor: iono.. adam sandler? (your mom is a pretty good actor)
-Actress: all the fine ones ( britanny snow )
-Cartoon: spongebob squarepants,, fairly odd parents.. and DBZ (family guy, etc.)
-Cartoon Character: goku..patrick..cosmo ( stewie griffin)
-Author: Stephen King...William Shakespeare (idk)
-Animal:raccoons dont ask me why ( stuffed )

-Smell: girls of course..haha.. I smell good sometimes.. ryte after I take a shower (fruity lotions and perfumes, fresh bread, freshly cut grass, haha)
-Food: chinese & filipino food...mcdonalds and jack & the box (chicken)
-Drink: sunny delight and pepsi (raspberry ice tea!)
-Hangout: Whimsey...at skewl...in front of the library...we have out table we kick it at (my room haha or cyndy's room watching youtube =) )

[SEX / RELATIONSHIPS]
-Do you have a boyfriend / girlfriend: never had a gf (sigh) (nope)
-If not, do you have a crush: yes (not at the moment)
-Name of your crush: ask me.. ill tell you (dont ask me, lol)
-What’s so special about your crush: she’s nice (well if i did have one, i bet she'd be super special)
-Who are you "talkin" to: no one (nobody)
-Are you flirty:shy (when i'm comfortable)
-Are you a virgin: whats this word mean?.. jk.. yes (yes i am)
-Age of First Kiss: still to come (19)
-Have you ever cried for the opposite sex: yea.. ima crybaby (true statement)
-Do you have a "type" of person you always go after:yup yup (ehhh)
-Would you rather be dumped / the dumper: I duno we gunna end ne ways (neither)
-Would you rather have a relationship /a"hookup":relationship. I want sumthin to last (relationship)
-Have you ever liked your best friend of the opposite sex: well yeh hehe (to a certain extent)
-Do you want to get married: of course (someday)
-Do you want kids: yup yup (someday)
-Do you think that you have met the person you will end up marrying: hmm no one noez yet (not yet)
-How many people have you kissed: zero that meant nothing (just 3)
-How many people have broken your heart: one (a handful)
-Do you pick people by their looks / personality: both (confidence)
-Have you ever kissed one of your friends: ? (yes)

LAST PERSON OF THE OPPOSITE SEX...
-You Touched: dunt remember (myself)
-You Talked to Online: Joanna aka jojo.. hello! hehe (idr, havnet been on aim in awhile)
-You Hugged: kate I think (sha sha)
-You Kissed: never (secret)
-You instant messaged: jojo (idr)
-You Yelled At: my sister (most likey the same lol)
-You Slept with: I sleep solo (secret)
-You Made cry: I duno (idk)

HAVE YOU EVER...
- Been kissed: yes
- How many times: couple times
- Done Drugs: naw (once)
- Eaten an entire box of Oreos:no (nope)
- Been on stage: yea (yes)
- Dumped Someone: no (yes)
- Been in a car accident:yeh.. but not a “major” one tho.. juss a small one (nothing life threating)
- Been in love: yes.. but I regret it ( i have)

IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU...
- Cried: last 42 hours.. yes (no)
- Helped someone: yea (yes)
- Bought something: nope (yes)
- Gotten sick: no (yes)
- Gone to the movies: Naw (nope)
- Gone out for dinner: naw (yes)
- Said, "I love you": naw (nope)
- Written a real letter: naw (damn its been awhile)
- Talked to an ex: dunt have one (last week)
- Missed an ex: dunt have one (bleh)
- Talked to someone you have a crush on: yup yup (maybe?)
- Missed someone:no (always)
-Hugged someone:no (no)

xanga retro survery #1

first one is from 9/16/04 .. updated answers will be in parenthesis..enjoy =)

BASiiCSZ

[»] name: Ralph Warren Ordona Madriaga
[»] where is your favorite place to shop: newhere..as long as i stay fitted ;) haha..old navy da shiz and all other stores in da mall (hollister, pacsun, macy's)
[»] any peircinqs: nope (two, left ear lobe and cartilage)
[»] what are you most scared of: sometimes the truth..if u knoe wat i mean.. (failure)
[»] what are you listeninq to riqht now: my tv (my tv)
[»] where do you want to qet married: a nice big church. ( same)
[»] how many buddies are online riqht now: 23 (not online)
[»] what is one thinq you would chanqe about yourself: Be more commited, prove others wat i really can do.. (to stop being lazy, stop putting myself down and look at the bright side of things)

HAVE Y0U EVER

[»] qiven anyone a bath: not yet ;) ( my lil brother maybe)
[»] bunqee jumped: no (nope)
[»] skinny dipped: no (nope)
[»] ever been in love: kinda sorta maybe? (yes)
[»] ever cryed to qet yourself out of trouble: no (no)
[»] cried when someone died: yes of course (yes)
[»] lied: yes (yes)
[»] fallen for your best friend: not really, some say i do..but no0o0o (bleh)
[»] used someone: i dont think so (not intentionally)
[»] done somethinq you reqret: yep (yes)

CURRENT

[»] clothes: basketball shooting pants and a white shirt (pjs and a white tee)
[»] music: the TV haha (none)
[»] annoyance: Boredom (hungry)
[»] smell: nothing, i have a cold! (no)
[»] favorite music artist: linkin park is a group haha..but artist? uhmm..bryan adams (same plusmore)
[»] desktop picture: a toyota celica..YAYUH!! (sarah geronimo)
[»] book your readinq: "thousand cranes" (linguistics text book)
[»] CD in your CD player: slow jam mix (mix hip hop cd)
[»] dvd in your dvd player: darkness falls (robot chicken)

LAST PERS0N

[»] you touched: i dont remember (idr)
[»] huqqed: kaye at the mall i think (cyndy friday night)
[»] you imed: kenneth (ginalyn)
[»] you yelled at: i forgot (idr)
[»] you kissed: never =/(secret)

ARE Y0U

[»] understandinq: yeah (very)
[»] open minded: sure (i can be)
[»] insecure: sometimes (sometimes)
[»] interestinq: oh, yes (yup)
[»] random: all the time (all the time)
[»] hunqry: yes (yes)
[»] smart: not all the time unfortunately =/ (when i can be)
[»] moody: yesh (uh huh)
[»] hardworkinq: wen im in the mood (i can be)
[»] orqanized: no! (sometimes)
[»] healthy: not really..sometimes? haha (yah)
[»] shy: somtimes (at times)
[»] difficult: idk.. (yee)
[»] attractive: ;) my fan signs should answer that haha (you tell me)
[»] messy: ewww..wat do u mean?? ( very )
[»] responsible: at times (yes)
[»] obsessed: hmm.. (no)
[»] anqry: a lot (not right now)
[»] sad: a lot (not right now)
[»] dissapointed: at times (at times)
[»] happy: not a lot (majority of the time)
[»] hyper: wen i have too much soda (yeeee)
[»] trustinq: yup (as always)
[»] talkative: sure
[»] leqal: one more year

RAND0M

[»] in the morninq i am: sleepy (sleepy)
[»] love is: lyke wind..u feel itz there but u cant see it ( like diarrhea, just can't hold it in)
[»] i dream about: her lately ( i hardly remember my dreams)

WHiiCH iiS BETTER

[»] coke or pepsi: Pepsi. (pepsi)
[»] flowers or candy: flowers (flowers)
[»] tall or short: not to tall short girls are kute haha (short)
[»] eminems or skittles: skittles (skittles)
[»] aim or phone: cellphone (text)
[»] electric or bass: electric (bass)
[»] resturaunt or at home: restaurant (restaurant
[»] movie theaters or an all around at home movie: movies. (home)

D0 Y0U

[»] sit on the internet all night waitinq for someone to im you: yeah! haha (not anymore)
[»] wish you were a member of the oppostie sex: haha yup..but jus for a day (no)
[»] cry because of somethinq someone says to you: yup (haha)

NUMBER 0F

[»] of hearts you`ve broke: i dunno (idk)
[»] of tiqht freinds: a few ( a few)
[»] of cds you own: dunno not a lot..lyke 20 at least..i DL music ( alot)
[»] of scars on your body: idk (none)

FiiNAL QUESTii0NS

[»] do you like fillinq these out: wen im bored (bored)
[»] gold or silver: gold (gold)
[»] what was the last movie you saw in theaters: Exorcist the beginnings (xmen origins)
[»] favorite cartoon: spongebob (family guy)
[»] could you live without your computer: oh heck no (not to long)
[»] would you color your hair: yes (temp)
[»] could you ever qet off the computer: yeah (yes)
[»] hablas espanol: si .. mucho bueno (que?)

my feet are killing me!

haha, thought my title sounds like what a girl would say, but its true! been walking around all day at work today. started work at 3. but before work went to church then the mall as usual on my sundays. at work had a huge debate/arguement whatever you want to call it with one of my coworkers about basketball. it was really loud in the activity room, coworkers were pulling me away, cuz all surprised cuz they never saw me like that, haha, it was crazy, yet fun. just let me get my opinion out, then we all good. the whole kings/lakers issue is old, but never dies, haha. on a lighter note, can't wait to we leave to vegas! about a week to go, so excited, you dont even know. well its really hot, just like yesterday, this weekend has been in the 100s and its only may! june and july will be a b!tch. well i'm a cut this short today, gonna go watch taken on bluray! sweeeeeet. later days

what a week

the past week has been a roller coaster. emotionally and physically. i'm exhausted. i'm relieved that's coming to an end. and happy as well. yesterday we had this even at work, and i had so much fun, i love my coworkers who i'm glad to call them as friends rather than coworkers, not all my coworkers share the same relationship i have with them, and i'm close to a few of them, and i love it. a few days before was my best's 21st birthday, and we went out to celebrate at dave and buster's. at the bar i really opened up to her, and i was good and bad. i said a lot of shit that i really thought i was going to keep to myself , but after saying it made me realize what kind of shithole i was in. she made it clear that i should fix it though, so i tried. i planned everything in my head on what to say and do. DIDNT COME OUT THE WAY I WANTED. i fucked up. big time, i'm jeopardizing a friendship with a really close friend. and the days were counting down where i wouldnt be able to see this person for awhile, let alone if she'll even respond or reply to my messages. but benefit of the doubt, as long as i do what was right, things will come out smoothly. it was hard, but i did respect her wishes. i honestly didnt do what i did to annoy or whatever. that's how i am. i know they might like be known as my bestfriends, but i never opened this up, but i think i can say i have 3 "best" friends, one that is known obviously, and the other two, i can say just unfolded. wether you agree or not, you have become one of my bestfriends now. i didnt mean to give you a certain kind of attention that would of pushed you away. i in fact love to be on my phone, i message the few same ppl daily, i didnt mean anything by it. with that said, i was worried that it was coming to an end. but i know i keep saying this, but i can't stress it enough, that i DO want to start over. i want to push all that shit that ppl talk about, that ppl spread rumors about, fuck all that, and just start over. back to the day where we can just sit down eat yogurt and talk about ethics. as much as i miss all the other stuff. i WANT it to be just like that. a simple close/bestfriend kind of relationship, nothing more nothing less. i'm also glad i went out last night, for your last night. ha. let me tell you, i had soo much fun. young crowd, so i did what i can, lmao. it feels good to get out of your shell though, and just have fun! maybe a month ago, i'd still be the person, who would be sitting down in the corner, drinking soda, and watch everybody have fun, nope, not anymore. i'm excited to just have fun! woohoo! sham woohoo! lol. well i got to get ready now, its my brothers first communion today, and then i have work. later days

running smoothly

i typed a whole bunch just now, then deleted it..i was insecure on what i wrote, so i rather talk to this person directly to share what's on my mind these past few days. sorry other readers, later days.

happy mothers day

had an interesting night, text messages and tweets all through my sleep, i'd wake up once in awhile to reply to them, haha. its ok though, i enjoy doing so =) anways, i was off today, so that was good, went to church with the familia, then ate at grand buffet. oh man, i sure think i got my moneys worth, i took hella food, hella seafood! mmmm had like two plates of oysters, crab, fish, shrimp, you name it. and dim sum! it reminded me of cyndy, that's why when i was getting food i saw the sign for dim sum, and i was like hey! haha, after eating, we went to modesto's mall, when shopping for my mom. i got her a matching guess wallet and purse. after her, i went shopping for myself, just got a shirt at A&F though..that's all didnt want to spoil myself today lol. after the mall went home, worked on my linguistics paper for a little bit, and right now i'm watching american dad and contemplating on what to do next..later days

am i trippin??

if someone deletes your picture off their myspace after it being there for awhile in a certain album, then all of a sudden, just my pic with this person is deleted and the rest of the pics in that album are gone, and the only reason they give is .. "oh its cuz i was ugly in that pic" and mind you this album has been up for more than month , and this person has the nerve to say i'm trippin off of it!? i was just asking what happened.. daaaaaaaaaa heeckkkkk man.

anyways, my day: saturday morning chores consisted of running errands for my mother dear, picking up food, buying towels at sears cuz the last day sale, doesn't sound much right, but having to do that right when you wake up, and you have to go work in a few hours. i agreed cuz i thought i had plenty of time, but turns out i had to wait for the food to be prepared etc etc. well yeah finally got that done with barely enough time go get ready for work, didnt even have time to eat! got to work, clocked in at 12:25 i think, and i had a group at 12:30 "medication education" group went smoothly, it was just one of those days i felt good after a group. doesn't happen all the time, but often enough to say that i love my job. =) a resident said to me today, i like your groups cuz they keep us mentally prepared. and i was like thanks, i'm glad to have served a purpose here, haha. i love some of my residents. keyword is some. hahah. after work, headed straight home , cuz my auntie was by herself watching my bros and cousin, cuz everyone else took my grandma to the airport cuz she's leaving for the PI .. lucky, i want to go so bad! but its alright, going to vegas at the end of the month, so i'm excited for that =) later days

sleeping beauty

i had the last two days off and back to work today. bleh. my two day break was fun, yet productive. did my laundry on wednesday, and pretty much spent my whole day at home, havn't been at home for like a long period of time lately haha, i've been coming home at different times this whole weekend which has affected my sleeping schedule, but i can't complain, i had a blast this weekend. thanks. yesterday, was my payday, but first i went to class, then picked up my check, then went to the bank to deposit it..didnt want to go home after that, but everyone was busy! cyndy was studying, nichelle was sick, and ginalyn and i was suppose to do something together, but she wanted to wait till the afternoon, so my whole morning was boring, i went home and watched robot chicken ha. that afternoon, met up with cyndy, studied at my house, glad to have amazed her with my ps3 and blu ray, and my dog, and just simply chillaxin on our family couch =) hmm what else, i guess that's it for the past few days, hopefully today will be great. TGIF. later days

robot chicken

i use to say i hate my life often, hate is such a strong word dont you think? more like strongly dislike my life" right? oh well, but i can honestly say that recently i can say the opposite. i can see through ppl's bullshit, i know who my true friends are and its no surprise they're the same friends from the start. and i like how the fact of growing on some of these friendships. yes we knew each other for a long time, but to get to the point, where we just don't care about what the world has to through at us. through thick and thin, we'll always have that special relationship, that only you and i will know. let ppl talk, who gives a f**k. on another note, i love my best, she really cares about me though sometimes most ppl are oblivious to what ever i try to put out, i sometimes really try to make her and whoever understand what i feel.. thanks..

i have a wierd sleeping schedule now, haha, thanks, you know who you are =)

ps. i'm hungry going to go do a taco bell run or something..later days

cheesecake factory!

finally went to the cheesecake factory! didnt have any cheescake though! haha, all good, the food was good, the alcohol was good, haha thanks. but yeah, on the drive home, finally had the talk that i wanted for a while now. it was really nice, and happy to finally clear things up. ppl will talk no matter what, but f**k what you hear, as long as i know what is happening between us, then that's all that matters. like what it says on top of my page..you think you know, but you have no idea. and please please please, dont butt into my personal life, if i'm comfortable letting you know, then i will..i blog here for a reason..dont constantly call and message me expecting to read me like a book. hmmm yeah, i'm in the library right now, just got done uploading pics, you should go comment one or two, or three =)

ps: my car is black not silver! haha oh man that was hilarious.

*sigh*

finally back online! and being able to read her blogs..i'm happy and sad at the same time the past few days. especially after last night, i dont know what to think..i know its hard for me, and i can only imagine if its hard for you to. i honestly respect your views though, of wanting know what's in store for the future, not disappointing your mom, not getting to attached and watch it just get pulled away from right under you. and also my perspective, how i really dont want anything to change either..i LOVE how it is, but there is still the side of me, that want's something more. but scared to directly tell her..i can only think she knows how i feel deep inside. i'm shy, but she keeps me sane. i get comfortable as the mintues past, as the hours past, i get so comfortable. like i told her, i would never see this coming, but thankful it has happened. its like i keep asking myself, should i ask her for just one chance? i vow to not disappoint you. but at the same time i can't ask her that, its going to put so much pressure, and that alone can jeopardize our friendship. and i can never forgive myself if that were to happen..but for now, i'm keeping it how it is..and when she reads this, maybe she can shed more light on it..i'm not however going to get my hopes up..happiness is not to much to ask for, but that's all i want..